Entry 32--The Diary of Bowling Pin #9 on Lane 12

     I took a beating at work today. Again. Needless to say, it was awful. I was knocked over 167 times by 10:55, when things finally started to taper down. Counting my falls is one of our kind's few pastimes. And of course, whenever my day is brutal, those haughty twins behind the 1 always seem to have the best time and lord over the rest of us. They think they’re such special double turkeys because there are days when the pocket is closed tighter than Winona Ryder’s pocketbook in a department store. I hope league night knocks them on their asses next week.      At any rate, I was so pissed when I came home tonight, I just couldn’t take any of my wife’s bitchin, so I threw her in the gutter. Other than that, today's only bright spot came around 4 o’clock, when Jim Tucker won a beer frame. Today's beverages were sponsored by the Champagne of Beers, whoo hoo. But the drama only worsened after that, since Tucker’s ball has knocked up at least 50 pins since last week. A few other lanes suggested rubbers to help the problem, but it was a league game, and the Bumpers only come in for kids, or so we’re told. Personally, I don't believe it. The Bumpers are actually distant cousins, but we're close, even though we only talk once in awhile. I do wish they were around more to do their jobs.      To top off the day's drama, the 8 pin told me that he’s having an affair with 4. I gave him a classic bowler’s high five, but inwardly I’m concerned about the recent morality around the alley, or lack thereof. I mean, look at the blue 8 lb. ball. Her three holes have been filled every night since the 12 lane addition back in 2005. Maybe we can petition for some of that pine spray the shoes are always yakking about. The shoes are pretty cool dudes, and could probably spot us a bottle to clean some of our balls up.      I just really wish today could have been more like last night’s sweet rave, during the Bruxton boy’s party. Imagine, raving at work! Alas, the weekend shall come around again. And I can look forward to the hijinks our cousins will bring this Saturday, since the next party is for young kids.      Well, I must be off to practice my positioning. My boss told me I'm falling at less than the required 6 degrees. If I can’t maintain that, I’ll be given away to a child with four hands.